#1 humor site on the 'net

Floor Lighting

Avoiding house obstacles in the dark

Floor Lighting thanks to Roy Taylor

Low-lights for late night seniors

QuotaBills
Many hands make light work. - English Proverb

With great power comes great electricity bill. - Unknown

A proverb is much light condensed in one flash. - Simmons

It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan. - Eleanor Roosevelt

He who sleeps on the floor will not fall off the bed. - Robert Gronock

It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness. - Chinese Proverb

Energy is liberated matter; matter is energy waiting to happen. - Bill Bryson

Opportunity dances with those who are already on the dance floor. - Jackson Brown

There is no genius in life like the genius of energy and industry. - D.G. Mitchell

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. - Dean Martin

I have a feeling my Check Liver Light may come on this weekend. - Unknown

If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus. - Robin Williams

Treat your friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light. - Jennie Jerome Churchill

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

There are two kinds of light – the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures. - James Thurber

Bound by paperwork, short on hands, sleep, and energy... nurses are rarely short on caring. - Sharon Hudacek

We have been too long in darkness. Once already we have been in the light, and we want it again. - Alexander Dubcek

The art of art, the glory of expression, and the sunshine of the light of letters, is simplicity. - Walt Whitman

Yoga is a light, which once lit, will never dim. The better your practice, the brighter the flame. - B.K. Iyengar

Imagine a place where everyone chooses to bring energy, passion, and a positive attitude every day. - Stephen C. Lundin

Fathers are like a lighthouse - when there is fog his children can always depend on seeing the light. - Unknown

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

The next woman who gets hold of me is gonna light up like a pinball machine and pay off in silver dollars. - Jack Nicholson

The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. - Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.

Milton's style was exactly right for what he did. He had enormous energy. Enormous vitality. He still does. - Steve Allen

Every ceiling, when reached, becomes a floor, upon which one walks as a matter of course and prescriptive right. - Aldous Huxley

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. - Matthew 5:14-16

Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in. - Alan Alda

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato

Direct your energy toward achieving a goal, and tackle the problems with an emphasis on edging closer to a successful result. - Harvey Mackay

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

It is obvious that we can no more explain a passion to a person who has never experienced it than we can explain light to the blind. - T S Eliot

A rooster crows only when it sees the light. Put him in the dark and he'll never crow. I have seen the light and I'm crowing. - Muhammad Ali

My candle burns at both ends,
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends -
It gives a lovely light! - Edna St Vincent Millay

You are a divine being. You matter, you count. You come from realms of unimaginable power and light, and you will return to those realms. - Terence McKenna

Every sort of energy and endurance, of courage and capacity for handling life's evils, is set free in those who have religious faith. - William James

Distinguished ancestors shed a powerful light on their descendants, and forbid the concealment either of their merits or of their demerits. - Gaius S. Crispus

The light of a new day always chases the shadows of the night away, and shows us that the shape of our fears is only the ghost of our own minds. - Terry Goodkind

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. - Spike Milligan

Some primal termite knocked on wood,
And tasted it, and found it good;
That is why your Cousin May
Fell through the parlor floor today. - Ogden Nash


Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns

Bird Condo

Legal Assistance For All

Chinese Law School

Do Not Stack

Stairway Chute

Walkway Not

Pirate Vacation

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Redneck Spaghetti

Wild Game Nutrition Guide

Alaska Gas

Definition Of A Good Friend

Redneck Car Repair

Self-Propelled Rocket