#1 humor site on the 'net

Dodgy Ticker

Where to keep your heart ticking

Dodgy Ticker thanks to Howard Chapman

Almost Free blood pressure clinic Down Under

QuotaBills
A light heart lives long. - William Shakespeare

Laughter is the best medicine. - the Joe-kster

Nurses are the heart of healthcare. - Donna Wilk Cardillo

I'm just a true Irish boy at heart. - Colin Farrell

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

The heart has its reasons that reason knows nothing of. - Blaise Pascal

The heart of an Irishman is nothing but his imagination. - George Bernard Shaw

Bless your little Irish heart and every other Irish part. - Irish Blessings

The fastest way to a man's heart is through his chest. - Roseanne Barr

A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. - Rupert Brooke

Only the knife knows what goes on in the heart of a pumpkin. - Simone Schwarz-Bart

The great man is one who never loses his child’s heart. - Mencius

A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart. - Jonathan Swift

For the man who prays in his heart, the whole world is a church. - Sylvain of Athos

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

The last mosquito that bit me had to check into the Betty Ford clinic. - Joanna Lumley

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

No good work is ever done while the heart is hot and anxious and fretted. - Olive Schreiner

If I ever have to stop taking the subway, I'm gonna have a heart attack. - Edward Norton

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better. - Unknown

Among the things you can give and still keep are your word, a smile, and a grateful heart. - Zig Ziglar

In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty. - Christopher D Morley

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. - Swami Sivananda

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

Those who don't know how to weep with their whole heart, don't know how to laugh either. - Golda Meir

The heart of another is a dark forest, always, no matter how close it has been to one's own. - Willa Cather

The best and most beautiful things in life cannot be seen, not touched, but are felt in the heart. - Helen Keller

If the sign on your heart says, "WELCOME", the love will come pouring in from everywhere. - Susan Jeffers

Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou

Any path is only a path, and there is no affront, to oneself or to others, in dropping it if that is what your heart tells you. - Carlos Castaneda

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

I have a maple leaf tattoo over my heart, quite literally, and my two favorite things on Earth are being in Canada and making movies. - Jay Baruchel

Morality cannot be legislated, but behavior can be regulated. Judicial decrees may not change the heart, but they can restrain the heartless. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Meditation here may think down hours to moments. Here the heart may give a useful lesson to the head and learning wiser grow without his books. - William Cowper

The line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between classes not between parties either - but right through the human heart. - Alexandr Solzhenitzyn


Knot Art

Zipper Scar Tattoo

Swiss Army Mega Tools

Law of Emotion

Eiffel Tower Modifications

Joyous Lawyers

Acupuncture Face

Star Wars Episode VIII

LiverPool

Digger Dog

You Guys Make Me Sick

Chu Your Food Well

Men's Wedding Photos

Wrench Dinosaur

Suddenly An Oven

Redneck Shower Head

Twin Dish

I Finally Know Why

Finally Got The Sink Fixed

Barred

Surprise Party At The Zoo

Dog Cross

Restored Beauty

Perfect Girl