#1 humor site on the 'net

Control Brothers

Relatives of the Copy and Paste twins?

Control Brothers thanks to Jim Serritella

Keeping the family in control

QuotaBills
Control your own destiny or someone else will. - Jack Welch

You were born an original, don't die a copy. - Unknown

Nothing really sets human nature free but self-control. - Paul Bottome

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. - Joan Rivers

Lord, give me chastity and self-control, but not just yet. - St. Augustine

I couldn't find the remote control to the remote control. - Steven Wright

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

Laws control the lesser man... Right conduct controls the greater one. - Mark Twain

I've been imitated so well I've heard people copy my mistakes. - Jimi Hendrix

The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can. - Jean Kerr

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

Your attitude towards anything in life is completely under your control. - Micah Lacerte

While your circumstances are beyond your control, your character is not. - John C Maxwell

If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough. - Mario Andretti

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. - Groucho Marx

The nation that secures control of the air will ultimately control the world. - Alexander Graham Bell

Courage, moderation, self-control - above all, the peace of a contented mind. - Lillian Watson

Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead? - George Carlin

If you want to control someone, all you have to do is to make them feel afraid. - Paulo Coelho

She was starting to think that it might be fun to be in control of the universe. - Nicki Elson

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it. - Moses Hadas

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. - John Steinbeck

The wise man should be prepared for everything that does not lie within his control. - Pythagoras

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

Copy nature and you infringe on the work of our Lord. Interpret nature and you are an artist. - Jacques Lipchitz

It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing. - Lemony Snicket

You cannot always control what goes on outside. But you can always control what goes on inside. - Mr. Yoga

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

The control of large numbers is possible, and like unto that of small numbers, if we subdivide them. - Sun Tze

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

If you can't control your anger, you are as helpless as a city without walls waiting to be attacked. - Book of Proverbs

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

The worst excuse you could ever come up for not turning in homework is that you have no one to copy it from. - Unknown

Dignity comes not from control, but from understanding who you are and taking your rightful place in the world. - Gordon Atkinson

Our whole constitutional heritage rebels at the thought of giving government the power to control men's minds. - Thurgood Marshall

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

Yoga is invigoration in relaxation. Freedom in routine. Confidence through self control. Energy within and energy without. - Ymber Delecto

Leadership is a matter of having people look at you and gain confidence, seeing how you react. If you're in control, they're in control. - Tom Landry

Be yourself no matter what other people think. God made you the way you are for a reason. Besides, an original is always worth more than a copy! - Unknown


Plywood Portrait

Subway Dinner

Trump Cross

Dubai-ous Hotel

Animal Rescue

Openish Hours

Jim's Happy Hour

Moses' Headache Relief

Medical Breakthrough

Burning Water

Math Watch

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Elderly Rocker

Daddy, Can I Ride It?

Macklemore's grandad, Macklemost

Star Wars Howl

Swing Dad

Multi Task Dad

Twin Load

Sometimes Dads Are Wet For Work

Hospital Friends

Ways to say 'Dad' in Different Languages

Back Massage Track

Baby Sitting