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Birth Control At Its Finest

Preventing back seat accidents

Birth Control At Its Finest thanks to Keith Blake

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Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

You know what's cool? My kids think I'm ordinary. - Michael J. Fox

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back. - Richard Lewis

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

At the base and birth of every successful venture you will find an enthusiast. - Winston Churchill

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

The yoga mat is a good place to turn when talk therapy and antidepressants aren't enough. - Amy Weintraub

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

There are some things in life where it's better to receive than to give, and massage is one of them. - Al Michaels

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular. - Jay Leno


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