#1 humor site on the 'net

African Airstrip

Why Africa Air wasn't cleared for landing on the runway

African Airstrip thanks to Keith Blake

Waiting in line for the next food shipment

QuotaBills
Owning a drone does not a pilot make. - Alex Morritt

Rise and rise again until lambs become lions. - Robin Hood

Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. - Lord Kelvin

When spiderwebs unite, they can halt even the lion. - African Proverb

Would a lion cheat on his wife? No, but a Tiger Would. - Unknown

Luck is like having a rice dumpling fly into your mouth. - Japanese Proverb

The sky is the limit only for those who aren't afraid to fly. - Bob Bello

Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air. - Johann C. F. von Schiller

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

Sharks are the lions of the sea. They glamorize the oceanic glory. - Munia Khan

It is better to live one day as a lion, than a thousand days as lamb. - Roman Proverb

Our Air Corps reunion was held to rememmorate the great things we done. - Archie Bunker

An optimist is someone who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery. - Walter Winchell

The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm. - Alexander Woollcott

If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus. - Robin Williams

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

The nation that secures control of the air will ultimately control the world. - Alexander Graham Bell

I love Halloween: the cold air, the spooky dangers lurking around the corner. - Evan Peters

Not the cry, but the flight of a wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow. - Chinese Proverb

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. - Woody Allen

My tent doesn't look like much but it is air-conditioned and has exceptional location. - Fennel Hudson

We breathe air, trees make air, homework kills trees, therefore homework is going to kill us all. - Unknown

I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep. I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion. - Alexander the Great

Nothing can move a man who is paid by the hour; how sweet the flight of time seems to his calm mind. - Charles D Warner

Caesar dreamed that he was flying above the clouds, and now that he was clasping the hand of Jupiter. - Suetonius

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

A drone is often preferred for missions that are too 'dull, dirty, or dangerous' for manned aircraft. - Nick Hahn

When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. - Henry Ford

They talk about the failure of socialism but where is the success of capitalism in Africa, Asia and Latin America? - Fidel Castro

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know so it goes flying anyway. - Mary Kay Ash

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all. - Robert Orben

Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each. - Henry David Thoreau

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I dream of the realization of the unity of Africa, whereby its leaders combine in their efforts to solve the problems of this continent. - Nelson Mandela

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


Sinking Feeling

XL Safety Shoes

Colorectal Exam For Dogs

How To Stop Snoring

Bridge Uplift

Shark Steaks

Hippy Birthday

Heineken Meets Star Wars

Head Butt

Just Like Grandpa

High Heel Diver

Leading Edge Climber

Garden Gnome Soccer

Florence Time

Bird Trio

Chess Sudoku Puzzles C

I Want My Own Room

Fish Flops

Lip Gloss

Beer Pong

Canadian High Five

Kodak Moment

Third Fiddle

Clown Down