#1 humor site on the 'net

Milkshake Desweetener

Wisse prefers a White Spot milkshake

Milkshake Desweetener thanks to Pepijn Boomsluiter

Mixing drinks at The Old Spaghetti Factory, Whistler, B.C.

Milkshake Desweetener thanks to Pepijn Boomsluiter

QuotaBills
Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Cheese - milk's leap toward immortality. - Clifton Fadiman

Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea. - Janet Clarkson

Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn. - Garrison Keillor

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

That it will never come again is what makes life so sweet. - Emily Dickinson

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

I know too well the poison and the sting of things too sweet. - Adelaide Proctor

Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water. - WC Fields

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out my nose. - Woody Allen

True love is like little roses, sweet, fragrant in small doses. - Ana Claudia Antunes

Opposition may become sweet to a man when he has christened it persecution. - George Eliot

When in doubt as to the applicability of a disinfectant, use soap and water. - Martin H. Fischer

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Parting is such sweet sorrow,
That I shall say good night till it be morrow. - William Shakespeare

Life is a slice of watermelon: never without seeds but sweet 'til the bitter end. - Unknown

When ya go out there in the water and ya start crossing your longirudes and lassitudes. - Archie Bunker

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet. - William Shakespeare

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

Nothing can move a man who is paid by the hour; how sweet the flight of time seems to his calm mind. - Charles D Warner

I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies. - Neil Gaiman

Life is like a good watermelon, sweet and juicy... but you still have to pick out the seeds to enjoy every bit of it. - Unknown

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

A leader is not an administrator who loves to run others, but someone who carries water for his people, so that they can get on with their jobs. - Robert Townsend

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler


Grandma's Controller

Tire Rotation

Grand Prix Roller Blades

Son Shine

BachScratcher

Under Control

Straightjacket Fashion

Husband Parking

Why Stand In Line?

Weight Watchers Bus

Bread Pitt

Redneck Hayride

How To Reduce Complaints at Work

Corset Bound

Bike Trike

Pizza Air's Inaugural Delivery

Tomato IV

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Mechanic's Work Table

Alzheimer's Wing

I Don't Have Mushroom

Texas Peace Sign

Letting Your Hair Down

Eagle Makeup