#1 humor site on the 'net

Brain Lamp

Lighting a-head of its time

Brain Lamp thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
I can't brain today. I have the dumb. - Unknown

Getting caught is the mother of invention. - Robert Byrne

Following the light of the sun, we left the Old World. - Christopher Columbus

Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. - Kahlil Gibran

It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness. - Chinese Proverb

My mind works like lightning; one brilliant flash and it's gone. - Unknown

Stay the course, light a star, change the world where'er you are. - Richard Le Gallienne

May it be a light to you in dark places, when all other lights go out. - JRR Tolkien

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

May you have warmth in your igloo, oil in your lamp, and peace in your heart. - Eskimo Proverb

Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken. - Warren Buffet

There is a light at the end of the tunnel... hopefully its not a freight train! - Mariah Carey

I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it. - Groucho Marx

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. - Mitch Hedberg

How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a naughty world. - William Shakespeare

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is putting out the lamp because dawn has come. - Rabindranath Tagore

Man who invented the hamburger was smart; man who invented the cheeseburger was a genius. - Matthew McConaughey

Architecture is the learned game, correct and magnificent, of forms assembled in the light. - Le Corbusier

Whenever you see darkness, there is extraordinary opportunity for the light to burn brighter. - Bono

Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it. - Maurice Chevalier

Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lamp posts… for support rather than illumination. - Andrew Lang

Free trade is terrible. Free trade can be wonderful if you have smart people. But we have stupid people. - Donald Trump

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. - John Quinton

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

We - we need strength, we need energy, we need quickness and we need brain in this country to turn it around. - Donald Trump

Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

I think that most people would rather face the light of a real enemy than the darkness of their imagined fears. - Max Brooks

It makes you wonder. All the brilliant things we might have done with our lives if only we suspected we knew how. - Ann Patchett

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato

The Brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up and does not stop until you get into the office. - Robert Frost

I'm not saying I'm gonna change the world, but I guarantee that I will spark the brain that will change the world. - Tupac Shakur

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions? - Scott Adams

The brain is not a bag of traits. It's startlingly complex. There are few or no single genes with a consistent effect on the mind. - Steven Pinker

Human beings will line up for miles to buy a bucket of catastrophes, but don't try selling sunshine and light; you'll go broke. - Chuck Jones

My candle burns at both ends,
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends -
It gives a lovely light! - Edna St Vincent Millay

Distinguished ancestors shed a powerful light on their descendants, and forbid the concealment either of their merits or of their demerits. - Gaius S. Crispus

Give your subconscious a chance to work by turning your brain off from time to time. Don't focus on work or solving problems constantly. - Harvey Mackay

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy


Animal Taxi

Lego Key Holder

Mechanic Apprentice

Redneck Helicopter

Hairy Egg

Fork Door Handle

Making Hockey More Popular

Suitcase WorkPlace

One-Knight Stands

Stealth Cell Phone Tower

Holes of the World

Sunken Bed

Australian Wildfire Survivor

Rat Toys

Radish Camouflage

Apple Art

Cake Finders

Shot Glasses

Frog Spout Security

Chopper Bicycle

Canadian Suntan

Walkway To Heaven

Groucho Marx and Jimmy Savile

Despicable Shoes