#1 humor site on the 'net

Run, Turkey, Run

Will he make it past the plucking station?

Run, Turkey, Run thanks to Mel Hardman

Bernard Matthews - Britain's 'Turkey King' makes one last round

Run, Turkey, Run thanks to Mel Hardman

QuotaBills
Does running late count as exercise? - Unknown

Eternity is two people and a roast turkey. - James Dent

Here he comes, swelling like a turkey-cock. - William Shakespeare

Of all the 36 alternatives, running away is best. - Chinese Proverb

No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - St. Ambrose

A peacock that rests on his feathers is just another turkey. - Dolly Parton

Always chase your dreams instead of running from your fears. - Unknown

What is the use of running when we are not on the right road? - German Proverb

For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold

We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for. - Unknown

If at first you don't succeed, you're running about average. - Unknown

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I'd be honest. - Rodney Dangerfield

I get my exercise running to the funerals of my friends who exercise. - Barry Gray

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D. Rockefeller

The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running. - Unknown

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown

Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving. - Unknown

I was in the ROTC. Of course, ROTC stood for "Running off to Canada." - Jay Leno

One cannot spend one's entire life running into bathrooms when danger calls! - Reif Larsen

The turkey is living proof that an animal can survive with no intelligence at all. - Harvey D. Comstock

Thanksgiving is the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. - Michael Dresser

Go see that turkey for yourself, and see for yourself why you shouldn't see it. - Samuel Goldwyn

There are men running governments who shouldn't be allowed to play with matches. - Will Rogers

It isn't failing that spells one's downfall; it's running away, giving up. - Michel Greco

I object to people running down the future. I intend to live the rest of my life there. - Charles F Kettering

We waste a lot of time running after people we could have caught by just standing still. - Mignon McLaughlin

All men should strive to learn before they die, what they are running from, and to, and why. - James Thurber

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. - W.T. Purkiser

I love running. I’m not into marathons, but I am into avoiding problems at an accelerated rate. - Jarod Kintz

Gratitude is a twofold love - love coming to visit us, and love running out to greet a welcome guest. - Henry Van Dyke

Happiness consists in activity: such is the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and not a stagnant pool. - John M. Good

Tarry a moment to watch the chaos of a playground, crayola-colored shirts of running children, all trying out their wings. - Dr. SunWolf

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

Running! If there's any activity happier, more exhilarating, more nourishing to the imagination, I can't imagine what it might be. - Joyce Carol Oates


Undergarment Financing

Shear Dog

Open For Business

This Rocks

Lifting Heavy Objects

Tomato Treat

Wrong Planet

Evaluating Something

Student Driver

Cat Milk

Guitar Pool

Facebook Africa

UniCorn

Less Is More

Taking The Bait

Puppy Circle

Prehistoric Flash Drive

Hair Weavers

Chemical Solutions

Stealth Snake

Coffee Morning

WrenchWare

Pushing The Envelope

Social Media Explained