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When you come to a fork in the road, take it. - Yogi Berra

Don't dig your grave with a knife and fork. - English Proverb

BANG - A four-letter Italian word for good-bye. - Archie Bunker

I usually take a two-hour nap from one to four. - Yogi Berra

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear. - Mark Twain

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

Liam's like a man with a fork in a world of soup. - Noel Gallagher

Five out of four people have a problem with fractions. - Unknown

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. - Brendan Behan

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

Repartee is something we think of twenty-four hours too late. - Mark Twain

If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky? - Stanislaw J. Lec

The Republicans aren't the only ones who want four more years. - Unknown

A hungry man is more interested in four sandwiches than four freedoms. - Henry Cabot Lodge, Jr.

It was so windy that one of our chickens laid the same egg four times. - Unknown

They call it golf because all of the other four-letter names were taken. - Ray Floyd

Four very powerful words to say to your child: "I believe in you." - Kevin Heath

The four stages of man are infancy, childhood, adolescence, and obsolescence. - Art Linkletter

I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it. - Groucho Marx

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six. - Yogi Berra

In America the President reigns for four years and journalism governs forever and ever. - Oscar Wilde

Morcelli has four fastest 1,500-meter times ever. And all those times are at 1,500 meters. - David Coleman

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

I went to a 7-11 and asked for a 2x4 and a box of 3x5's. The clerk said, "ten-four." - Steven Wright

Every leap year I like to jump. It’s a good way to get my daily exercise in every four years. - Jarod Kintz

There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse. - Quentin Crisp

Most of us spend too much time on the last twenty-four hours and too little on the last six thousand years. - Will Durant

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

The prime purpose of being four is to enjoy being four - of secondary importance is to prepare for being five. - Jim Trelease

He is accelerating all the time. That last lap was run in sixty-four seconds, and the one before in sixty-two. - David Coleman

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself. - Louis Nizer

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes. - Bob Thaves

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Five frogs are sitting on a log. Four decide to jump off. How many are left?
Five, because there's a difference between deciding and doing. - Mark L. Feldman & Michael F. Spratt


Radish Camouflage

Apple Art

Cake Finders

Shot Glasses

Frog Spout Security

Chopper Bicycle

Canadian Suntan

Walkway To Heaven

Groucho Marx and Jimmy Savile

Despicable Shoes

Prayer Conditioning

Lazy People Make Excellent Engineers

Spaghetti Western

Under The Weather

Backpack Barney

My Sweet Potato

Who Needs a Guard Dog?

My Next Life

Mouse Insider

Close Ups

Redneck Camera Phone

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Redneck Cupboard

Homeless Signs