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Swine Flu Novel

Charlotte's got a new web

Swine Flu Novel thanks to Kyle Ziegler

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Diabetes is a lousy, lousy disease. - Elaine Stritch

Astrology is a disease, not a science. - Maimonides

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? - George Carlin

When you treat a disease, first treat the mind. - Chen Jen

Love is the only disease that makes you feel better. - Sam Shepard

You want people to think you live in a pig's eye? - Archie Bunker

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

There is no physician who can cure the disease of love. - African Proverb

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

A nurse will always give us hope,
an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets

Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine. - Irwin Edman

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

A novel is a piece of prose of a certain length with something wrong with it. - Unknown

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force. - Dorothy Parker

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

Not enough people know what Lyme disease is and the dangers of being bitten by an insect. - Gigi Hadid

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

I know runners who have suffered a tick bite and ended up with Lyme disease. I'll take an angry moose any day. - Don Kardong

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

The worst disease which can afflict executives in their work is not, as popularly supposed, alcoholism; it's egotism. - Robert Frost

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Alzheimer's disease starts when a protein that should be folded up properly misfolds into a kind of demented origami. - Gregory Petsko

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown


Fluent Sarcasm

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