#1 humor site on the 'net

New Player

Premiere League Foosball with kick start option

New Player thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Foosball equivalent to a golf handicap

QuotaBills
Girl: A giggle with glitter on it. - Unknown

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

A rich man is never ugly in the eyes of a girl. - French Proverb

Ballet is good, because it makes you stand up tall. - Carine Roitfeld

Wrestlers are a bunch of wanna-be football players. - Brian Bosworth

Maybe she's a spaghetti girl... straight until wet. - Jodi Lerner

A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor

Football is a game designed to keep coal miners off the streets. - Jimmy Breslin

A girl must marry for love, and keep on marrying until she finds it. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman, and a pretty girl. - Charlie Chaplin

Who would ever think that so much can go on in the soul of a young girl? - Anne Frank

All I know most surely about morality and obligations, I owe to football. - Albert Camus

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid. - Hedy Lamarr

The calendar and the clock are all set by football season and the off-season. - Tom Coughlin

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. - Erma Bombeck

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

The ballet toe shoe is one of the few instruments of torture to survive intact into our time. - Unknown

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

A little girl is sugar and spice and everything nice - especially when she's taking a nap. - Unknown

I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet. - Phyllis Diller

Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it. - Maurice Chevalier

Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will

Boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. - Jack Handey

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home. - Rodney Dangerfield

We have to prove beyond the shadow of a doubt that it is talent and training, not color, that makes a ballet dancer. - Arthur Mitchell

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always enjoyed feeling afraid. I think it is the most delicious feeling there is. - Domingos Monteiro

Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does. - Stuart H Britt

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? - Jim Bouton

Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level. - Bob Hope

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. - Ernest Hemingway

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head comes off. - Rodney Dangerfield


Bike Trike

Pizza Air's Inaugural Delivery

Tomato IV

Mechanic's Work Table

Alzheimer's Wing

I Don't Have Mushroom

Texas Peace Sign

Letting Your Hair Down

Eagle Makeup

Everything Is OK

Knot Art

Zipper Scar Tattoo

Swiss Army Mega Tools

Law of Emotion

Eiffel Tower Modifications

Joyous Lawyers

Acupuncture Face

Star Wars Episode VIII

LiverPool

Digger Dog

You Guys Make Me Sick

Chu Your Food Well

Men's Wedding Photos

Wrench Dinosaur