#1 humor site on the 'net

Leave Toes Outside

What weird food do you crave?

Leave Toes Outside thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde

Where love sets the table, food tastes at its best. - French Proverb

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake. - Alfred Hitchcock

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much. - George Harrison

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. - Benjamin Franklin

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. - Unknown

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. - Mitch Hedberg

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

The ballet toe shoe is one of the few instruments of torture to survive intact into our time. - Unknown

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

Like a camel, I can go without a drink for seven days - and have on several horrible occasions. - Herb Caen

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. - Mark 10:25

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

It's a piece of cake until you get to the top. You find you can't stop playing the game the way you've always played it. - Richard M Nixon

Wit is the key, I think, to anybody's heart. Show me the person who doesn't like to laugh and I'll show you a person with a toe tag. - Julia Roberts

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie


Hard Working Cop

Cattle Herding in Africa

Dutch Cowboy

How Bachelors Kill Moths

Tonsil Ring

Portrait Gallery

Piano Dog

The Art Of Politics

Martini Shirt

American Mustache

Wedding Room Dress

Redneck TP

Big Bird Feeder

City Work Crew's Slow Day

Cow Trampoline

Suspicious Blood Donor

Friends In High Places

Hair Cut Toupee

Finger Physio

Texas Steak

Triathlete with a Drinking Problem

Awning Truck Advertising

Racial Profiling Starts Early

Your Move