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Chewing Gum Hazard

Government Health Warning - beware of 'Hemorrhoid Helper' workouts

Chewing Gum Hazard thanks to Wally Zatylny

Hemorrhoid Helper Class - Rectum? Darned near killed 'em!

QuotaBills
Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

The greatest wealth is health. - Virgil

I'm in no shape to exercise. - Unknown

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

Health insurance should be a given for every citizen. - Jesse Ventura

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. - Mark Twain

What is the use of running when we are not on the right road? - German Proverb

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

Maybe I oughta get one of them priests in to exercise with her. - Archie Bunker

Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it but don't swallow it. - Hank Ketcham

Yoga is not just a workout - it's about working on yourself. - Mary Glover

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away. - Paul Terry

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D. Rockefeller

After I make a lot of money, I'll be able to afford running for office. - Christy Romano

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

I live in California, so I do stand-up paddle board, which is a killer workout. - Ashley Wagner

Google+ is the gym of social networking: we all join, but nobody actually uses it. - Unknown

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up. - Unknown

If you fall out of that window and break both your legs, don't come running to me. - Groucho Marx

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. - Marsha Doble

I object to people running down the future. I intend to live the rest of my life there. - Charles F Kettering

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order. - John Adams

The test and the use of man's education is that he finds pleasure in the exercise of his mind. - Jacques Martin Barzun

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

What can be added to the happiness of man who is in health, out of debt, and has a clear conscience? - Adam Smith

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got. - WC Fields

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

Being President is a lot like running a cemetery. You've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening. - Bill Clinton

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Running! If there's any activity happier, more exhilarating, more nourishing to the imagination, I can't imagine what it might be. - Joyce Carol Oates


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