#1 humor site on the 'net

Two Meals In One

If wishes were fishes

Two Meals In One thanks to Mike King

When you know you've had a good day of fishing

QuotaBills
I got bigger fish to fly - Archie Bunker

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

Fish and visitors stink after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

He who has no falcon must hunt with an owl. - Danish Proverb

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. - Irina Dunn

I will be the Thai equivalent of Eddie the Eagle. - Vanessa Mae

Love is the net where hearts are caught like fish. - Muhammad Ali

I have laid aside business, and gone a'fishing. - Izaak Walton

You cannot fly like an eagle with the wings of a wren. - William Henry Hudson

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

The fun of fishing is catching 'em, not killing 'em. - Norman Schwarzkopf

A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

If the Eagle Scouts had some sort of Sith equivalent, Marcone was it. - Jim Butcher

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson

Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide

Good fishing is just a matter of timing. You have to get there yesterday. - Milton Berle

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. - Steven Wright

Governing a large country is like frying a small fish. You spoil it with too much poking. - Lao-Tzu

Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after. - Henry David Thoreau

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

Luck affects everything; let your hook always be cast. In the stream where you least expect it, there will be fish. - Ovid

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. - Ernest Hemingway

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

The shaft of the arrow had been feathered with one of the eagle's own plumes. We often give our enemies the means of our destruction. - Aesop

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell


Revolutionary Cooking

Fish View

Pilot Bike

Stealth Woman

1st Rolex

Dish Dryer

Young Mechanic

Angry Mathematician

McLobster

Cliff Walks

Reading Chair

Puzzle Ad

Feeding Time

Rural Free Delivery

Urban Camper

Fractured Foot or Hand?

Yolkswagon

March of the Penguins - Canadian Version

Shoelusion

Almost Done

Swim Vacation

Foot Circle

Sumo Fault

Psychic Fair