#1 humor site on the 'net

Rural Free Delivery

A bundle of joy delivered to your home

Rural Free Delivery thanks to Irvin Kauffman

QuotaBills
Genius is sorrow's child. - John Adams

The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

Every child begins the world again. - Henry David Thoreau

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

He knows his olive trees better than he knows his children. - Rebecca Helm-Ropelato

Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed. - Maria Montessori

I continue to stay young, right? I produce children, I stay young. - Donald Trump

Bricks may make a house, but the laughter of children makes a home. - Irish Proverb

If your parents never had children, chances are... neither will you. - Dick Cavett

You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. - Jack London

The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden

If we don't stand up for children, then we don't stand for much. - Marian W. Edelman

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula. - Dave Barry

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley

We do not inherit the earth from our parents. We borrow it from our children. - Unknown

Anytime you see a turtle up on top of a fence post, you know he had some help. - Alex Haley

Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity. - Bo Bennett

If you could take a selfie of your soul would you find it attractive enough to post? - Unknown

Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher

Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too. - Lionel Kauffman

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. - Stacia Tauscher

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them. - Phyllis Diller

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money. - Abigail Van Buren

Every child should have an occasional pat on the back as long as it is applied low enough and hard enough. - Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

Children raced outside. She surveyed their trail - traces of sticky fingerprints across everything, like wee poems. - Dr. SunWolf

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

The fundamental defect of fathers, in our competitive society, is that they want their children to be a credit to them. - Bertrand Russell

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, 'Am I having fun?' - Christopher Meloni

Tarry a moment to watch the chaos of a playground, crayola-colored shirts of running children, all trying out their wings. - Dr. SunWolf

Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals. - Robert Orben

There's a limit to how many times you can read how great you are and what an inspiration you are, but I'm not there yet. - Randy Pausch

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm. - Bill Vaughan

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. - Phyllis Diller


Dr. Hedgehog

Flower Frame Heels

I'll Be Right There

Frankfurt Subway Entrance

Winter Deflation

Baby Papaya Crossing

Cat Tofu

Dad Sandwich

The Untangler

Glendambo Welcome

Leaning Tower Of Pisa Dog

Slim People Bathroom

Soothing Hairstyle

Truck Driver Birth

Spider Trap

Nice Day For A Ride

Motion Picture Selfie

Winter Mirror

Is This Really Happening?!

House 'Broke'rage

2019 Hooters Owl & Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Restaurant Valentines

Cute Puppy

Unhappy Valentine's Day