#1 humor site on the 'net

Last Day On The Job

Had enough? Time to spill the beans...

Last Day On The Job thanks to Bob Tasse

QuotaBills
Many hands make light work. - English Proverb

What isn't tried won't work. - Claude McDonald

Don't torture yourself... that's my job. - Carolyn Jones

Be true to your work, your word, and your friend. - Henry David Thoreau

It's a poor rule that won't work both ways. - Frederick Douglass

I do not like work, even when somebody else is doing it. - Mark Twain

Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job. - Jim Rohn

An optimist is simply a pessimist with no job experience. - Dilbert

Get in touch with your passion and put it to work at work. - Marilyn Suttle

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have. - Thomas Jefferson

He is a man, and he is afraid. This is not a good combination. - Kristin Hannah

Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs. - Henry Ford

Talent is no match for hard work, determination, and perseverance. - Unknown

There is no prejudice that the work of art does not finally overcome. - Andre Gide

It doesn't work to leap a twenty-foot chasm in two ten-foot jumps. - Proverb

People forget how fast you did a job - but they remember how well you did it. - Howard Newton

It's true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance? - Ronald Reagan

Forget all the reasons it won't work and believe the one reason that it will. - Unknown

In America, we like everyone to know about the good work we're doing anonymously. - Jay Leno

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime. - Scott Adams

Never wear a backward baseball cap to an interview unless applying for the job of umpire. - Dan Zevin

A first-rate laboratory is one in which mediocre scientists can produce outstanding work. - Patrick M.S. Blackett

I drink maple syrup. Then I'm hyper so I just run around like crazy and work it all off. - Rachel McAdams

I don't like work - no man does - but I like what is in the work - the chance to find yourself. - Joseph Conrad

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

Our Age of Anxiety is, in great part, the result of trying to do today's jobs with yesterday's tools. - Marshall McLuhan

Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work in hand. The Sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus. - Alexander Graham Bell

Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. - Mickey Rooney

A benefit of any job is laughter. It should never be a crime to have fun on the job. It may be a crime not to. - Terry Paulson

If you do a good job for others, you heal yourself at the same time, because a dose of joy is a spiritual cure. - Ed Sullivan

Nighttime is really the best time to work. All the ideas are there to be yours because everyone else is asleep. - Catherine O'Hara

If you start by promising what you don't even have yet, you'll lose your desire to work towards getting it. - Paulo Coelho

I don't really drink sodas, but when I have popcorn or pizza I need a little. It's the perfect combination. - Alessandra Ambrosio

Three rules of work: Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. - Albert Einstein

In Mexico, an air-conditioner is called a "politician" because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well. - Len Deighton

If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers! - Homer Simpson

We've got to work to save our children and do it with full respect for the fact that if we do not, no one else is going to do it. - Dorothy Height

It's said in Hollywood that you should always forgive your enemies because you never know when you'll have to work with them. - Lana Turner

Worrying is less work than doing something to fix the worry. Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom with the dishes. - P.J. O'Rourke

I do not love to work out, but if I stick to exercising every day and put the right things in my mouth, then my diabetes just stays in check. - Halle Berry


Dutch Cowboy

How Bachelors Kill Moths

Tonsil Ring

Portrait Gallery

Piano Dog

The Art Of Politics

Martini Shirt

American Mustache

Wedding Room Dress

Redneck TP

Big Bird Feeder

City Work Crew's Slow Day

Cow Trampoline

Suspicious Blood Donor

Friends In High Places

Hair Cut Toupee

Finger Physio

Texas Steak

Triathlete with a Drinking Problem

Awning Truck Advertising

Racial Profiling Starts Early

Your Move

Florida Bird Flu

Croc Surfing