#1 humor site on the 'net

How To Hire Engineers

Speak geek if you want to hire a geek!

How To Hire Engineers thanks to Cherei McCarter

(PS: dial 1 900 249 0100, ext. 10)

QuotaBills
Most problems are solved with resolve. - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

The writer is the engineer of the human soul. - Joseph Stalin

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Death and taxes are unsolved engineering problems. - Romana Machado

When you marry your mistress, you create a job vacancy. - James Goldsmith

It's a job never started that takes the longest to finish. - JRR Tolkien

You're the lowly pheasant with the job of keeping her here. - Archie Bunker

The job of an educator is to teach students to see vitality in themselves. - Joseph Campbell

The real opportunity for success lies within the person and not in the job. - Zig Ziglar

The conventional view serves to protect us from the painful job of thinking. - John Kenneth Galbraith

People forget how fast you did a job - but they remember how well you did it. - Howard Newton

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

I read the book of Job last night. I don't think God comes out well in it. - Virginia Woolf

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

To be safe at the expense of the liberty of other people is a difficult equation. - Madeleine Albright

Wherever we look upon this earth, the opportunities take shape within the problems. - Nelson A. Rockefeller

Listen long enough and the person will generally come up with an adequate solution. - Mary Kay Ash

Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire public relations officers. - Daniel J. Boorstin

If you think your boss is stupid remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was smarter. - Albert Grant

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

Nothing changes the gender equation more significantly than women's economic freedom. - Gloria Steinem

I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it. - Bill Gates

There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those who are good at math, and those who aren't. - Unknown

Never let life's hardships disturb you... no one can avoid problems, not even saints or sages. - Nichiren Daishonen

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

Wherever I go, people are waving at me. Maybe if I do a good job, they'll use all their fingers. - Frank King

To me, job titles don't matter. Everyone is in sales. It's the only way we stay in business. - Harvey Mackay

At the end of the day if you want to entertain people, you've got to take your ego out of the equation. - Paul Feig

I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everyone to tell me the truth - even if it costs him his job. - Samuel Goldwyn

One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump

If you are in the job for glamour, you're in for the shock of your life. The media is a huge shark pool. - Trisha Goddard

If you don't make mistakes, you're not working on hard enough problems. And that's a big mistake. - Unknown

If you do a good job for others, you heal yourself at the same time, because a dose of joy is a spiritual cure. - Ed Sullivan

I love solving puzzles, I love finding my way around obstacles, and I love learning new things about technology. - Kevin Mitnick

Mistakes are the stepping stones to wisdom. We learn from trial and error; we become wise by understanding problems. - Leon Brown

In every jigsaw puzzle, there is one key piece, and the only tough job is to identify that key piece from the mess out there. - Sapan Saxena

Amazingly when you add life and consciousness to the equation you can actually explain some of the biggest puzzles of science. - Robert Lanza

You have to do what you love to do, not get stuck in that comfort zone of a regular job. Life is not a dress rehearsal. This is it. - Lucinda Basset

The formulation of a problem is often more essential than its solution, which may be merely a matter of mathematical or experimental skill. - Albert Einstein


Chocolate Math for 2018

Moon Filament

Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Glass Prescription

Redneck House Cleaning

2fer Sudoku Puzzles E

Straightjacket Fashion

Why Stand In Line?

Shelf Ready Sleeper

Deadneck Repairs

Starbucks Bethlehem

Bouncing Checks

Abbreviated Beetle

Nose Ring

Look At It This Way

Holy Bagel

The Ig Nobel Awards

Dead Hand

Redneck Hayride

Fishing Dog

Samurai Sudoku Puzzles E

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Lost Dog

Under Control