#1 humor site on the 'net

Back Bacon For Kids

Sleeping on your best friend and breakfast

Back Bacon For Kids thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Pork is my friend. - Tom Douglas

Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

Pulled pork jokes never get old. - Joel Edgerton

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Life is short. Eat cookies for breakfast. - Unknown

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

I have a great relationship with Roger Ailes. - Donald Trump

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler

Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Ireland Proverb

I love super crispy, almost burned, snapping-crispy bacon. - David Lynch

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

Bacon is going to save the world. I don't know how but it will. - Unknown

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

I am guilty of asking the Senate for pork and proud of the Senate for giving it to me. - Ted Stevens

Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster

Don't ever wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it. - Cale Yarborough

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves. - WC Fields

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

You don't go walking into the proverbial lion's den lightly. You start with a good breakfast. - Jim Butcher

Number theorists are like lotus-eaters – having once tasted of this food they can never give it up. - Leopold Kronecker

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation. - Homer Simpson

Any processed chicken from any place - I'll order it in a heartbeat. I'm very picky about my pork, though. - David Chang

The pig is not just pork chops and bacon and ham to us. The pig is a co-laborer in this great land-healing ministry. - Joel Salatin

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie


Australian Construction Security

India Road Assistance

Cow Walking

Cultural Exchange

Meowzart

Bonus Baby

Strawberry Heart

Water Skiing in Russia

Plumber's Party

Hand Face

Moon Harvest

Reach For The High-Hanging Fruit

CheckMate

Ship Tow

Redneck Turkey Shoot

Costco Wine

Downer Parking

Baconurkey

Camel Herders of the 21st Century

Redneck Palm Pilot

Turkey Day Selfie

Spool Turkey

Meal Alert

Turkey Not