#1 humor site on the 'net

Amish Friends

Things couldn't be better back on the homestead

Amish Friends thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Friends are the sunshine of life. - John Hay

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

True friends stab you in the front. - Oscar Wilde

Friends are God's apology for relatives. - Hugh Kingsmill

Treasure your relationships, not your possessions. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

I have a great relationship with the Mexican people. - Donald Trump

I have no friends and no enemies - only competitors. - Aristotle Onassis

I have friends struggling with autism, juvenile diabetes. - Nicole A. Parker

If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone. - Maxwell Maltz

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

A good book is the best of friends, the same today and forever. - Martin F Tupper

I get my exercise running to the funerals of my friends who exercise. - Barry Gray

In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney

I got a lotta best friends. Some o' them I don't even hardly know. - Archie Bunker

We need old friends to help us grow old and new friends to help us stay young. - Letty Cottin Pogrebin

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. - Ed Cunningham

Often we have no time for our friends, but all the time in the world for our enemies. - Billy Joel

I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones. - Oscar Wilde

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Never make excuses. Your friends don't need them and your foes won't believe them. - John Wooden

As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice: You can be right or you can be happy. - Ralphie May

Prosperity makes friends and adversity tries them. A true friend is one soul in two bodies. - Aristotle

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

I was the class clown so I was used to performing and fooling around in front of my friends. - Dominic Monaghan

Tart words make no friends: A spoonful of honey will catch more flies than a gallon of vinegar. - Benjamin Franklin

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart. - Unknown

I have a great relationship with the blacks. I've always had a great relationship with the blacks. - Donald Trump

He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, and he who has one enemy shall meet him everywhere. - Ali ibn-Abi-Talib

If we would build on a sure foundation in friendship, we must love friends for their sake rather than for our own. - Charlotte Bronte

It is a good thing to be rich and a good thing to be strong, but it is a better thing to be loved by many friends. - Euripides

Relationships are about give and take; not tit-for-tat. If you're keeping score, you'll lose at your own game. - Faydra D. Fields

The greatest mistake we humans make in our relationships: we listen half, understand quarter, think zero, and react double. - Unknown

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

As we grow up we think we lose our friends. But the truth is that we don't lose friends, we just learn who the real ones are. - Unknown

Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas


Foot Care

Guitar Dog

Cutout Coin Silhouettes

Tree Tattoo

Alt-Ctrl-Del Pillows

Portable GPS

Australian Cyclist

Helicopter Cuts

Holland Bike Lane - For Pros Only

Twins' First Piano Lesson

Foosball for Girls

Youth Walk

Last Selfie

Broccoli Muffins

Get Along Shirt

Rooftop Steps

It's Not My Job

Mathematician's Truck

Redneck Baby Stroller

Redneck Estate Sale

Blonde Car Mirror

Corn Maze Warning

Lane Closure

Texting For Dummies