#1 humor site on the 'net

Negotiations Texas Style

Texas solves the Middle East Peace Process impasse

Negotiations Texas Style thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

How y'all settle things in Texas

President George W. Bush, center, discusses the Middle East peace process with Prime Minister Ariel Sharon of Israel, left, and Prime Minister of the Palestinian National Authority Mahmoud Abbas in Aqaba, Jordan, June 4, 2003

QuotaBills
Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins

Peace is the only battle worth waging. - Albert Camus

We will not have peace by afterthought. - Norman Cousins

Love is a great wrecker of peace of mind. - Susan Cheever

There is no way to peace. Peace is the way. - A.J. Muste

What we need is Star Peace and not Star Wars. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Find inner peace? I looked; it wasn't there. - Bob Geldorf

My peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you. - John 14:27

For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord. - Unknown

Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins

I greet you in the name of peace, democracy, and freedom. - Nelson Mandela

As the French used to say, "the peace of resistance." - Archie Bunker

Plant the seed of meditation and reap the fruit of peace of mind. - Unknown

What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family. - Mother Teresa

In peace sons bury their fathers, but in war fathers bury their sons. - Croesus

Real Peace is always unshakable... Bliss is unchanged by gain or loss. - Yogi Bhajan

The General was essentially a man of peace, except in his domestic life. - Oscar Wilde

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Never, for the sake of peace and quiet, deny your own experience or convictions. - Dag Hammarskjold

The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson

Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles

Observe good faith and justice toward all nations. Cultivate peace and harmony with all. - George Washington

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. - Robin Williams

The same hot lightning that burns your blood with passion–– cools your fears with peace. - Aberjhani

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

The greatest comforts and lasting peace are obtained when one eradicates selfishness from within. - Gobind Singh

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

Be good, keep your feet dry, your eyes open, your heart at peace, and your soul in the joy of Christ. - Thomas Merton

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. - Benjamin Franklin

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

Peace is not something you wish for; it's something you make, something you do, something you are, something you give away. - Unknown

The people of the world genuinely want peace. Some day the leaders of the world are going to have to give in and give it to them. - Dwight D Eisenhower

The workers' and peasants' government proposes to all warring peoples... negotiations leading to a just, democratic peace. - Lenin

It is easier to lead men to combat, stirring up their passion, than to restrain them and direct them toward the patient labors of peace. - Andre Gide

Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming. - John Wooden


Trouser Iron

Bathroom Choices

Free Paper Strips

Redneck Bass Tape Measure

Bath Head Protection

Ivy Facade

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Cheating Husband

Stuck On High Gear

Bottom Blast Car Wash

Yo Mama Bin Shopping

Gangsta

Helmet Full Of Hair

Air Conditioner Repair

Redneck Towing

Walking His Fresh Food Pet

Japanese Tea Bath

Redneck Daycare

Hedge Hunter

Pilot Prop Job

Front To Side View

Moses' USB Tablets

Family Photo

Is Laughter The Best Medicine?