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Hospital Gown Insurance

Why ICU is an acronym for Hospital Gowns

Hospital Gown Insurance thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

Q: How is a Hospital Gown like insurance?
A: You're never covered as much as you think you are.

QuotaBills
No Sane man will dance. - Cicero

Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

Hollywood is an asylum run by the inmates. - Laurence Stallings

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

Misuse of "Literally" makes me figuratively insane. - Unknown

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

A nurse will always give us hope,
an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets

Am I afraid of high notes? Of course I am afraid. What sane man is not? - Luciano Pavarotti

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane. - Mark Twain

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler


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