#1 humor site on the 'net

Cat Got Your Tail?

Holding on to a good-ride diaper

Cat Got Your Tail? thanks to Rita Ewert

Kitten for sail

QuotaBills
A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex. - Bill Maher

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

When rats infest the palace, a lame cat is better than the swiftest horse. - Chinese Proverb

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffet

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week. - Will Rogers

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Lord Alfred Tennyson

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain


Fried Eggs - Military Style

Motorvation

Teenage Mutant Ninja Hay Bail

Driving Rain

Eddie Reward

Got Them All

Owlvis Presley

Motorcycle Limo

Runaway Tree

Human Explosion

Air Force Pilots

See You Later

Lunch Admirers

Loo View

Cell Phone Booth

Topless Kate Middleton

Skype Hype

Almost Batman

Cadillac Bike

Donut Decadence

Manmade Beach in Japan

Bacon Bikes

Animal Taxi

Lego Key Holder