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Microsoft Software Upgrade

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Microsoft Software Upgrade thanks to Jack Harris

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My wife gives good headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

A hooker once told me she had a headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

The two-headed boy in the circus never had such a headache. - WC Fields

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the one who asked why. - Bernard Baruch

The internet turns 30 minutes of homework into 2 hours of homework. - Unknown

If it weren't for my adam's apple, I'd have no shape at all. - Phyllis Diller

Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet. - Santosh Kalwar

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

A great wind is blowing, and that gives you either imagination or a headache. - Catherine the Great

Being in love with yourself means never having to say you've got a headache. - Ellie Laine

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. - Carl Sagan

In Hollywood, the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally. - W Somerset Maugham

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

From sixdegrees to Friendster to Facebook, social networking has become a familiar and ubiquitous part of the Internet. - David Kirkpatrick

In California virtually everyone has had their teeth whitened. If they all smiled at once, they would give us a headache. - Garrison Keillor

Until Facebook came along, there was hardly anywhere on the public Internet where you had to operate with your real name. - David Kirkpatrick

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

The day I made that statement, about inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the camcorder. - Al Gore

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco


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