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Happy Keester

Kids cracking up while enjoying Easter

Happy Keester thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

Happy Keester thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

QuotaBills
Easter is never deserved. - Jan Karon

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

Great shot kid, that was one in a million. - Han Solo

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

When I was a kid everyone used to call me pork 'n. - Michael Biehn

Acting is standing up naked and turning around slowly. - Rosalind Russell

You know what's cool? My kids think I'm ordinary. - Michael J. Fox

Easter is very important to me, it's a second chance. - Reba McEntire

When I was a kid I inhaled frequently. That was the point. - Barack Obama

There are few nudities so objectionable as the naked truth. - Agnes Repplier

Those have a short Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. - Benjamin Franklin

I'm Jewish, so I don't know much about Easter eggs. - Simon Kinberg

What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? - George Carlin

Easter is meant to be a symbol of hope, renewal, and new life. - Janine di Giovanni

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. - Rodney Dangerfield

As a kid, I got three meals a day. Oatmeal, miss-a-meal and no meal. - Mr. T

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. - Mark Twain

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if he wanted to be one? - Jackie Mason

I'm like the kid in kindergarten; I really do send valentines to everyone. - Susie Bright

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed. - Don Rickles

The trouble with dancing naked is that not everything stops when the music does. - Unknown

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

It's only when the tide goes out that you learn who's been swimming naked. - Warren Buffet

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

When I was a kid, I always wanted to live in California because I liked skateboarding. - Demetri Martin

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song. - Pope John Paul II

If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like. - Phyllis Diller

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. - George Burns

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

Apparently, as a kid, I used to eat spiders. Maybe there's some Freudian significance behind that. - Matt Smith

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

To be a successful father... there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years. - Ernest Hemingway

There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the bogeyman or Michael Jackson. - Bart Simpson

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer


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